Field Note: The Number Stayed Still

I moved from 10-pound dumbbells to 15-pound dumbbells.

I am 51 years old, holding around 166 pounds, and getting stronger. I have energy. I can bike hard through the woods, lift weights, swim, recover, and do it again.

The number on the scale has not offered much applause, but my body has.

Then I learned my husband had discussed my weight with one of his friends, which was exactly as cringe-inducing as it sounds.

“RESISTING” was brought up.

DUDES. I HAVE MUSCLE MASS. I MOUNTAIN BIKE.

So their conversation does not tell me anything useful about this body.

This body is busy adapting.

AS ALWAYS.

The brain likes efficiency too. Familiar patterns take less effort than constantly reconsidering everything from scratch, so it predicts, categorizes, repeats, and fills in blanks from what it already knows. Learning something new requires an update.

Maybe bodies and minds both need that opportunity:

Stop projecting your old story onto new evidence.

Not that I get that privilege….

At 166, the old story might say too heavy.

The new evidence says fifteen-pound weights.

It says muscle.

It says energy.

It says stronger at 51.

It says the number stayed still while something else moved forward.

Maybe progress sometimes requires learning to recognize what the scale cannot measure.

I’m working it out.

On a mountain bike.

On tougher gears.

Through the woods.

And with 15-pound dumb bell weights.

With a very full life.

Maybe I’m a loser.

I’ll lift 20 pounds dumb bells in a month or so.

I’ll let you know how I feel. :)