Field Note: Using AI Without Losing Self
There is a strange pressure in the conversation around AI.
People seem to think you must either reject it entirely or surrender to it completely.
But most of us are living somewhere in the middle.
We use calculators without forgetting how to think. We use GPS without forgetting there is a real road underneath us. We use spellcheck without believing it wrote the sentence.
AI can be like that too.
A tool. A sounding board. A place to organize thoughts. A place to get unstuck. A way to test language, ideas, structure, or possibility.
But the important thing is that you remain in the center.
Your memories. Your instincts. Your edits. Your stories. Your taste. Your discomfort. Your sense of what feels true.
That is where the real work still lives.
The danger is not using help. The danger is slowly handing over your own voice.
It is publishing something without asking:
Does this sound like me? Does this feel true? Would I stand behind this?
Sometimes a sentence may arrive fully formed. Sometimes an idea appears that you would not have found on your own. Sometimes the structure becomes easier.
But the heart still has to be yours.
The details that make something real are still human:
the way your coffee tastes in the morning
the sound of the dog walking through the house
the exact shade of the sky before a storm
the awkward thing your child said
the smell of ginger tea
the way loneliness feels in your body
the comfort of a lamp left on in the next room
No machine can live your life for you. No machine can know what it felt like to be you.
No machine can live your life for you. No machine can know what it felt like to be you.
Perhaps it is less like collaboration and more like taking a picture of your own thoughts.
The way a painter steps back from the canvas. The way a writer reads a paragraph out loud. The way you take a photograph of a painting and suddenly see what is actually there instead of what you thought was there.
AI can create that kind of distance.
Not so someone else or something else can tell you what is true. You have to advocate for your voice and truth to the best of your ability so you can see yourself and the tool more clearly.
So you can ask:
Is this what I mean? Is this honest? Is this really me?
Sometimes we are too close to our own thoughts to see them. Sometimes we need to hold them at arm’s length for a moment.
Not to lose ourselves. But to find ourselves more clearly.
So perhaps the question is not:
Is this pure?
But:
Is this honest?
Maybe using AI without losing yourself means remembering that you are still the artist.
You are the one holding the brush. You are the one choosing what stays. You are the one deciding what is true.
And that is enough.
After all, purity culture ….
Pure… cringe… I am definitely not a purity culture gal… i believe in burn and learn, tried and true, live and learn, rise from the ashes… happy accidents… serendipity…
Purity culture is cancel culture by another name. We’ve been on that dead end road before and some of us will not be tricked with propaganda and wordplay.
The better question is not whether something is perfectly pure.
The best questions are:
Is it thoughtful?
Is it thought provoking?
Is it truthful?
Is it human?
And most importantly, is it being used with care?
:) That is all I have to say about that :)
